Not to destroy the integrity of my counterparts blog, but I feel he needs a little introduction. In preparation for my blog war, I asked a buddy, who is a very good 'story teller' with tons of imagination and interesting perspectives on a lot of different things, to write some of his thoughts on my blog so that he could help me beat Kennan's blog. (www.kennanrocks.blogspot.com) He accepted, and though he's been on the team since the beginning of the month now, he's finally gotten the butterflies out of his stomach and posted his first blog. Though his real name will never be identified, you can call him Sydney O'Reilly. Please enjoy...
Being deployed to a place like Iraq has forced me to rely on online shopping in a big way. Everything from cigarettes to books and even food can all be delivered to my doorstep. and by doorstep i mean . . . hovel.
Over the course of the last year Amazon.com has become my lifeline to everything i need. I say need because amazon is, in fact, an addiction. As alluring to me as my beloved Newport cigarretes and strippers. Like a moth to the flame i am drawn to it.
If amazon has become an addiction, than its wishlist function is pure black-tar heroin. A.D.D can suck it! Short term memory? Fuck short term memory! I only have to remember something once and enter it into my wishlist, where it will live on in eternity with the other coveted items.
You can even preorder items or have recurring orders sent month after month without any effort. Video games that come out while in Iraq, preordered that shit!
The Army tries to starve us out, BAM . . amazon groceries, recurring orders. I tried getting my mom to send me food, and i got cashews! I am allergic to cashews. Fuck you mom, and your anaphylactic shock inducing gifts! Let that be a lesson to all, just because you survived the abortion that doesnt mean they will just let it go. Twenty five years later they're still trying, cashews? really?
All of this really just builds towards my overall dream. I have to go to multiple websites to get porn, cigarettes and food. Back home that place is called 7 eleven. Yet, such an online powerhouse does not exist. This wastes many minutes of my time. Why doesnt something like this exist?
Imagine being able to order booze, porn and cigarettes online, at the same place. Add food, books and household goods. Perhaps even electronics. If you created that store you would find yourself at the helm of a retail juggernaut. A veritable Genkhis Khan of the E-shopping world.
Now lets take it a step further. What if you could get anything you could possibly want on this website? Say, hardcore drugs or a tiger cub that you could raise as a pet. Free on friday nights? Find an asian mafia underground casino near you. Russian roulette anyone? Local games . .or. . . via webcam. Now that would be online gambling! It would be a cross between underground amazon and black market craigslist.
Legalities could easily be skirted by setting up shop in a foreign country with really lax corporate regulations. Customs would be an issue, but i still think i am onto something. Online shopping brings me everything i could buy in an actual store in the states. The new breed of online shopping i am advocating could bring everything i can't get at a store, delivered right to my doorstep.
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